A Very Happy Christmas and Good Wishes for 2011!

Well the big day is here and Santa has been, and somehow or other everything that needed doing got done lol! (Never did find that box of deccies though..?!?)

It is a beautiful day - blue sky and sunshine, but with snow laying all around it is wonderfully festive!

Below you will find my little slide-show showing my special cards and dotees - a very limited edition this year, but my Christmas wishes go out to all of my friends, and even the odd rellie who view my little blog!

Have a wonderful day, eat drink and be merry...and a happy sparkly New Year!

Sue xxx

Okay...who's nicked my Christmas decorations???

Its taken me a week or so to summon up the inclination to actually make my way to the walk-in cupboard in the corner of my bedroom to dig out my box of little decorations which will (maybe....eventually) look very nice on my little PINK Christmas tree. Unfortunately, this wasnt as simple as trotting over and opening the door......there was a years worth of random stash/carrier bags/boxes that would come in handy one day....and more, in the way...sigh! Indeed there were only a few inches between a ridiculous amount of stuff and my bed, and I was getting very fed up with stubbing my toes so it was time to tackle it, seeing as I had the very good reason - to reach those deccies.

However, two days & a bin bag full of 'stuff' (which is a mega achievement on my part...throw things away....oooo palpitations!) later, I finally reach the corner.....kick a few more bits and bobs out of the way and squeeze myself into the cupboard.....and what do I find? Just more random stash/carrier bags & boxes that will come in handy one day and (the clue is in the title of this post) NO decorations....aaagggghhh!

Unfortunately a room has more than one side plus three more corners....so the search goes on, I may or may not find the blooming things by Christmas Day! Oh well........

The good, no....miraculous news is, that I think I have done all my Christmas shopping...woohoo! About a week ago I had done nought, but thanks to Amazon, BHS online and ebay - I now await the delivery of my Christmas! Parcels have started to trickle through and Dad has been enlisted as my goods inwards manager - he is now on first names terms with postie and the various couriers and it is a system that is working well. I did manage a visit to Weston Favell with Carol last weekend and picked up lots of bits - she made a very good sherpa carrying all my bags...everyone could do with a 'Carol' lol!

At this point I would like to send oodles of sparkles Carol's way as she is suffering with a cold/flu.....a blooming sore throat anyway, is on antibiotics and for once in her life is having to take it easy. And you better keep resting missus and let the men in your house do all the work for a change....they might realise what a star you are!!! Get better soon Carol, Im missing your visits!

The other good news that I have to report...in the hope that I dont jinx things, is that I have made great progress with my pain control. I had a review at the hossie last week and surprise surprise, I saw the actual consultant who is dealing with me (rather than one of his hoppos). The bad thing however, was that Carol and I must have waited getting on for two hours before we got to see him, and by that time I just wanted to come home. I didnt ask many questions or say anything much as I was SO fed up, but I did describe the pain and expressed concern that it was lingering when I thought I would be much more improved by now. He reassured me that it could take longer, but more importantly, he advised me to take another tablet....one that I was taking when I thought all I had was a slipped disc and stopped when I was given the morphine. It deals with inflammation and wow...its made heck of a difference! I still take the long lasting morphine tabs morning and night, but for a few days I havent needed any liquid morphine top-up which is a treat as it tastes a bit yuk, and the new tabs along with paracetamol have got me through the days. Im still needing the stick, as without it my leg just doesnt want to take the weight (not surprising, the lump that I am!), but mostly I am pain free. Some discomfort when I just get up, and when I approach tablet time, but hugely better than I was which is not a moment too soon!

I have to watch that I dont jar or twist myself....I did the other day not realising the paths were icy, and I do pay for that a bit....clearly there is still a lot of weakness, but as I say, a massive improvement which has allowed me to get out there and do the bit of Christmas shopping, and have a tidy up around here.....which is much needed believe me! Fingers crossed it will be onwards and upwards from now on!

So...where are those deccies? I know all my big deccies and the big tree is over the garage, and Im not planning on tackling that.....good grief, the very idea! But I have a festive box which holds all my hand made felt goodies - I keep it in the house as the garage is damp and they would spoil over there....I do hope some 'helpful' person didnt put the box over there while I wasnt looking! Well, tomorrow is another day....a few brews first thing and I will tackle another corner....sigh!

I hope all of your festive plans are coming together nicely. Get a wriggle on as we are promised more snow next week so you want it all done by this weekend I reckon....lets just hope the posties can get through with all our parcels eh!

Hugs & sparkles all round!
Sue x

The wanderer returns.....

....although when I say wanderer, my wandering is still somewhat limited to shuffling between the pc and the kettle lol! But hey ho, here I am - I thought it was about time I showed my face!


Since my last post I have been rather up and down pain wise, but my endless chilling around the house has been puncuated with some fun activities...other than stash shopping that is!


Firstly I had my much needed makeover - not that one would know that now. I asked my sister to get a photo of my new hair & specs...but having washed my hair and let it dry without the aid of a hairdryer or straighteners.... its back to resembling rats tails.....here you are, not a face on view, there are limits lol....

Not exactly looking like 68 quids worth of hair-do is it lol! If we pan out a bit, you will see that I have actually been crafting...woohoo!



Having sadly resigned myself to NOT being able to knock up 40 or 50 festive dotees this year, I couldnt bear the thought of there not being a single festive dotee 2010 in the world, so I have embarked on making a very limited edition of 6 - these are for my family, and I am very sorry that they wont be winging their way up and down the country this year girls. I will do my best to make it up to you all as soon as I am able, as I do love my dotees finding new homes here there and everywhere!

Anyway, the photos are a bit rubbish, but if you look very carefully, I do have a little bling on the sides of my new specs...how fab! lol!

On this particular day, I finally, after many many efforts to suck my sister in to the world of crafting and a love of stash, had a breakthrough...just look at her here...

...totally engrossed in playing with pretty paper and shiny gems! She made lots of beautiful cards...



and this was her favourite...totally blinged up, you can tell who her teacher was cant you lol!



Im pleased to say that I think she is hooked, so hopefully there will be lots of play days for us from now on!

A couple of weekends ago I actually had an evening out - it was the office chicks Christmas do and we went out for a lovely meal. Lucky me, I was chauffeured to and fro' by our Lesley which was a real treat - it was a really fun evening and wonderful to see my buddies again. But what happened...noone picked up the camera, we dont have any evidence of our lovely evening which is a shame, Im quite annoyed with myself about that. The problem is, once Im sat down and got myself cosy, I dont want to move...sigh! It was lovely seeing you all girls and I long to be back with you again!!!

What else has occurred......? Oh, rather more frequent visits from my sons and their girls which is very nice. It has now been decided that they are all coming here for Christmas dinner - yikes - along with the two pooches (poor kitties!) so that should be fun!?! I am very much looking forward to it, but at the same time a little panicky as I tire so easily. I will deffo put a reserved sign on MY bit of the sofa, and will nap my way through the afternoon if thats how the mood takes me...while they are washing up! Thank goodness I will not be doing the cooking - thats Dads job, and its his roast spuds that are the big attraction...they are yummy! He will be glad to have an appreciative audience for his cooking after the moo I have been lately....I have to nibble on bits and pieces whenever I feel able, so have declined his dinners lately bringing about much sulking...but it cant be helped, Im done with forcing myself to eat things I dont want!

It will be my job to create a festive grotto.....seeing as we will have visitors, I suppose I really will have to make the effort! So far, this is my idea of putting the deccies on the tree...

LOL!

But look, it is a PINK Christmas tree...yay! A fiver in Tescos....bargain! You know you NEED one Lesley lol!

With the help of Amazon, I do have about half the presents I need to buy...luckily I do not have a dirty great long list...not like my sister who buys for the whole town I think...and their pets! The big day is coming upon us so fast though isnt it...I cant believe it, how fast this year has gone is unbelievable!

Now then, for those who are interested, how am I doing with my general condition? Well, now that we are some weeks into treatments, I am noticing patterns - what makes me feel better and what makes me feel worse.....and the good thing about that is, that there are 'better' times. I had that nasty infusion thing on Monday, and although it does give me some dodgy side-effects, at the same time it does ease the hip pain. I realised this mostly as last week, I was in so much pain it felt like I was back to square one.....but then this treatment was due, and when I noticed the easing of the pain yesterday I remembered that I had had less pain last time after the treatment, only I was so nauseous that I couldnt 'enjoy' it. Well, I have anti-nausea meds now which work a treat, and I guess thats how, over time, we will sort out the side-effects of the various things that I am swallowing or having injected into me, and be left with the good effects. I was very fed up last week, it really did feel like I was making no progress, but I have to be a more patient patient. It feels like ages since my radiation treatment ended but its only about 3 weeks, and the nurse said it could be six weeks or so before I felt the real benefit. Tomorrow, or rather later today, I have a review with the consultant. Carol will be with me, and we will be discussing the pain issues and if there is any more that they can do for me, or do I simply have to wait. I can wait....as long as improvement eventually comes. Im still lumbered with the stick and that is a real nuisance - I wont be able to get back to my zapping with that thing will I!!! However, on the whole I think I am making progress, slowly but surely - Im certainly happier in my head, and thats the most important thing!

So are you all ready for Christmas? I hope everything is going well for all my biddies, ooops, I mean buddies (I think lol!), and you have lots of fun things planned for the festive period! I hope Santa will be bring us oodles of stash eh girls!

Now that I have broken the ice blog-wise, I hope to be back on more regularly again...I will certainly be along again before Christmas. But for those who might not pop by again in the next couple of weeks, I hope you and your families have a wonderful time - no stress, no punch-ups...we can only hope eh! lol!

Hugs & sparkles, Sue x

Oops I did it again.....

...only I havent been stash shopping (yet!), just obsessing with feeding sheep and chopping down trees and the like - as you do at getting on for 3 in the morning!

I was up at 6...I dont know how Im keeping going, I think I went through the sleepy barrier and have now woken up just as I was going to head up the stairs to my cosy nest - which should be much needed after the day I had.....and I mean in a very GOOD way!

Getting up so early was a good start - my body wasnt so creaky and I had so many hours to fill! So I took myself out for a little taste of normality....'dashing' here there and everywhere getting lots of errands done which up to now my sister has been doing for me.

First stop was the surgery to drop in another repeat prescription (only because they would have said it was too early for this one item if I had asked for it on Monday)....and I thought, what the heck, rather than just post my slips in the box, Im going to take on the gestapo and get myself an appointment for a blood test. I have to have them a few days before each infusion - just to check levels of this and that I guess, and last time I did it at the hossie as I was already there having my radiation (all that seems like yonks ago already!) But it must be easier to get it done at the surgery (free parking for a start), so I organised that. Luckily I wasnt terribly fussed about specific days or times so there was nothing for her to pick a fight with me about - I could almost feel her disappointment!

From there it was up to the shopping centre to make more appointments - nice ones for a change. Firstly at the opticians as my specs fell to bits the other day, I cant recall if I reported on that, but I am in dire need of an optical makeover anyway...AND I had some special offer coupons for D&A/Boots, so I will be getting the old eyes tested on Friday. I am currently using a pair from years ago...a couple of prescription changes have occurred since these were made up, but Im coping quite well with them actually....except any attempts to read the paper are a trial as these dont have verifocals so I have to remove my specs and get my nose practically touching the paper to read it lol! I tend to just stick to the headlines..I can cope with those!

A couple of shops along is Subway...so that was tea sorted...yum yum!

Then I took the plunge and took my tatty looking self into the fancy hairdressers to book an appointment for foils and a cut. Ive never had foils before...Im still living in the world of rubber caps and the pain that goes with it, so this will be a treat....at enormous cost, but a treat nonetheless. However, because they had to do a skin test, they couldnt book me in any earlier than Friday so that is going to be one very busy day! I think thats why Im not rushing to bed...I suspect I will need a good old sleep once I do go up - one, to get over todays very long day, and two, to prepare for Friday. I cant wait, and it will be so nice to get my hair seen to before the office chicks night out on Sunday - the woolly mammoth look isnt terribly flattering!

I did consider doing a little Christmas shopping and took a little looky at the lovely stalls, but still couldnt settle on what to get. And I did take a couple of steps into Tescos only to walk straight out again - it was bedlam in there and I was just about done in at that point. Sooooooo....it was head for home, a top-up on pain meds and a nice brew - sorted! I felt very pleased with myself as bits of my brain are always telling me...nah, stay in the warm, and its quite an achievement to actually get my bum in gear and get myself out of the door! If I say so myself, welldone me!

I think its safe to say that improvements in my pain-levels really are being made now which is fabulous! As long as I keep on top of my meds then life is much more comfy than it was. The aim though is to do without the pain-relief altogether, and to be able to get around without the stick....Ive a way to go before that happens I suspect, but things are going in the right direction...woohoo!

Oh well, there you are...an upbeat post today, and now I really am ready for my bed...yawn!

Take care all, hugs & sparkles, Sue x

ps: perhaps just one quicky looky at cuttinedge before I go up....ha ha ha ha!

I really ought to head for my nest.....

.....but I just cant stop looking at crafty stash on the internet!!!!!!!!!!

Heeeeeeellllllp!.................No dont! lol!

Go on Sue, you can do it....log off, step away from the computer, and GO TO BED!

Hugs, sparkles & sweet dreams, Sue x

UPDATE: OMG I was up at 6...all bright eyed and bushy tailed....WEIRD!!!

Turning a corner...and re-discovering the world out there...!?!

But first...huge amounts of sparkles to our Gina, who it seems has not gotten over the shock of turning 50 yet and is feeling very poorly! I hope you will be turning a corner soon my lovely...and choose the right bloody corner to turn around hey missus!

As for me, do I dare to think that I am on the up?!? Having reported the easing off of my nausea the other day, it came back with a vengance (pretty much soon after I typed the nice sentence!) and I have been feeling very sorry for myself indeed - I couldnt even enjoy a brew, which in the words of Craig Wotsisname on Strictly was a DISAAAAAASTER! However, thanks to another cock-up at the surgery today, I believe I am now free of feeling icky..phew!

I had a rendezvous at noon with a friend, but thought I would get up nice and early so that I could go fetch my much needed prescriptions from the docs first thing...then I could drop them into Boots to be made up whilst said friend and I were slurping coffee. I felt pretty brave getting into the car and even contemplating the journey...it is a bit of a way and I havent driven for a while, but no...I was fine, I hadnt forgotten what to do and I didnt come anywhere near running anyone over - phew! I even managed to drive without having to physically lift my poorly leg from accellerator to brake (forgive rubbish spelling!), which was a vast improvement and added somewhat to my level of safety. But....and whenever heading to the surgery, there is always a blooming BUT isnt there - they couldnt find my prescriptions...sigh! They could see on their computer that they had been done, they had been signed....but they had also become invisible...tut! So first they send me over to the chemist to see if they had been taken over there....hobble hobble I go - 'no' says the chemist...though Im not convinced as they lost one once before, but hey ho...hobble back over to surgery (grumbling to myself - "I dont need THIS!"), by which time a flipping great queue had appeared. I eventually gets to the front and shakes my head, no..the chemist dont have it - and as the gestapo huffed and puffed, I gave my 'special' look that said, dont be messing with me missus and Im not leaving here without it! She sighed (even better than me!) and said she would print off another lot, and all I had to do was go upstairs and tuck it under the duty doctors door who would then sign it when she or he had finished with their patient and bring it out to me. Well, this is when things took a turn for the better. The duty doc today just happened to be my nice doc, and as the waiting room was empty when she appeared with my prescriptions she called me in for a little chat...just to ask how I was doing. WOW it was like a free appointment - yay! I told her I was doing quite well but the nausea was just going on and on and I asked her for any tips, ie: herbal teas or whatever. Oh no, I didnt need ought like that...she had just the pill for me, so promptly printed out another prescription (to add to the pile).....and by jove, the magic pill is working!!!

So in the end, the cock up turned out to be a blessing in disguise, as to access those pills without such a stroke of luck would have meant taking on the gestapo to get an official appointment, and when you are feeling icky you are just not up for the fight, and no doubt that would have meant more days of ickyness too...so RESULT!

However, by this time it was gone 11.30 so I had to rush home...no time to put a face on, tear out all the bits of paper I needed from the pile I had been given, sign them ready for Boots, and rush off out the door to meet up with Lynn.

The lovely Lynn is a retired office chick from Waitrose, and she comes right across from the other side of the county to get her hair done up at our local shopping mall. Well, when you find a hairdresser you like, you will follow them anywhere wont you lol! We had had a lovely natter on the phone last week and agreed to meet up, all being well..and thankfully all was well! I missed out on a lunch though - she was going to treat me, but I had to decline as I hadnt got the pills yet and my tummy wasnt 'doing' food. I did manage a nice cake and a coffee, and apart from a couple of wobbly moments brought about by all the noise and hustle & bustle, I was fine and it was SO nice to be out and about, and to get a big hug and a good gossip with my friend, thank you Lynn!

After goodbye hugs, I headed back to the car via Boots - to pick up my carrier bag full of drugs (its a scary sight, my bag of meds!)...and got waylayed by the door as I spotted the special offer goodies that they have been advertising - the 35 quids worth of free stuff if you spent just 22 quid on No.7 products. Well, what can one do - FREE STUFF! I love their serum - and if a face needed serum just now its mine, so that and a nail polish was enough spends to get my freebie...and all in such a gorgeous little bag too! How naughty am I....sod Christmas shopping, I will treat myself instead lol!

Anyway, I get home, pop a pill and soon enough the nausea went off - at last! I even dared to eat a noodly ready meal later which would have been a big risk any other day of the week I can tell you, and its stayed put! AND most importantly, Im enjoying my brews again..woohoo!

An evening of much needed rest and some reflection on my day followed. Icky'ness gone, and Im confident that now I have the right pills, it will stay that way. But also, I thought about how I had got through my day with my naughty hip and I have to say it is definitely feeling rather better. I had done a fair bit of walking about one way and another, especially compared to just shuffling from pc to kitchen and vice versa all day long, and yet I dont feel like I am paying for it. I am still 'with stick' but it feels more like it is helping me get about rather than enabling me to get around if that makes sense.....I know what I mean lol! Its the right time for improvements to be felt so fingers crossed, every day will bring more and more comfort. I thought I might even return to the mall later in the week and actually attempt some Christmas shopping...you know, buy things for other people and not myself lol...we will see! Ive been living in a bubble for way too long now and its time to escape!!!

On that up note, I will say nighty night and send out lots of special sparkles for our Gina, Alma, Maria & Valerie, and of course not forgetting our Charlie xxx

Big hugs, Sue x

More 'birthday season' sparkles for Gina...and a day of snoooooozing!

A gold star for postie for getting Ginas card to her today (to me it is still Wednesday)... and here it is:



I adore using that flower template - so much opportunity for BLING....which I hope incidentally, didnt all fall off en-route! You carry on enjoying your birthday season Gina, more treats to come!

So what other scintillating news and gossip do I have for you today? Mmmmm....not a lot Im afraid...it was another snoozy day for me! Got myself up at about 11.30...an 'early' morning for me then lol, though Im not sure why I bother, as by the time I make a brew, sit at the pc for five minutes firing off a 'good morning' email, Im ready for another kip and take to the sofa! I snooze away the day until tea-time, though it has to be said that tea-time in this house is rather too early - about half past two, when Dad presents me with a fry up...black pudding the lot. Well, I forgot to mention up to this point that I had been feeling rather nauseous since getting up - I was fine laying on the sofa, but a plate of grease just about finished me off! I did my best so as not to upset Dad...ate a few chips and a nibble at the bacon, but I could take no more. I really would have been better off with a bowl of crispies. So what else could I do after that but once again take to the sofa.... and keep very still in the hope that however small my intake had been, it stayed where it was...and thank goodness it did!

However, evening came along and my day really perked up when my Jamie and Tom came to visit, with Ruby the doggy...just to keep the kitties on their toes! It was lovely to see them and thankfully I had snoozed enough so could remain awake during their whole visit...yay! Tom was delighted to find treasure under the stairs...in the shape of a carrier bag full of 'out of date' crisps that my sister had left for him lol! They are all the flavours her lot wont eat so she saves them up for Tom as he doesnt give a fig about eat by dates and is crisp crazy! It saved him constantly rootling through the fridge too, though he did visit it once and discarded a pack of muller corners a month out of date (sorry to mention yoghurts Lee!)....there are limits and out of date yoghurts are an absolute no-no! Having said that, my Dad ate a spagetti bolognese yesterday that was 9 days past its best...I told him in no uncertain terms that if that made a repeat appearance, he could clear it up himself...ugh! Oooo aint you glad you popped by now with all this talk of nausea and potential vomiting...oh well, whats new!

Im glad to report though, that in the last hour or so, my nausea has passed...phew, I will look forward to a much more comfy day tomorrow then, and maybe I will be less sleepy too. Its that infusion malarky, it seems to take about 3 days to get over it - thats just how it was last time, but then things were far worse, so Im thankful for an easier time this go round! I might even risk a bowl of crispies before heading for my nest....

Happy Thursday folks and hugs & sparkles all round!
Sue xxx

A very Happy Birthday to Gina....and a general update....

As I begin to type, there is just half an hour of Gina's very special birthday left....50 today...woohoo Gina, Im glad you had a lovely day with lots of nice treats and visits from family and friends!

Of course at this point, I should be showing you the card I made for my lovely friend...but as she hasnt seen it yet, I shall save that 'pleasure' until hopefully tomorrow when postie has called on her. I cannot blame postie of course...having actually got it made in time, and that itself was a very close call...sis and I forgot to pop it in the post yesterday while we were out, so it didnt begin its journey to sunny Cardiff until late last night - I do hope it reaches you in the morning my lovely! Birthday 'seasons' rule - cards are never actually late then are they lol!

In our defence, yesterday was 'a bit of a day' to say the least! I had two appointments at the hossie booked - one was at 8.30 in the morning (meaning I got up at 6.30...OMG what a shock to the system!) This visit was for that nasty infusion that Im to have every 3 weeks, and the one that last time made me feel very poorly indeed. The reason we took the 8.30 appointment was that it was the first appointment of the day so there would be no delays - we would be in and out and home again in no time.....yeah right! We sat for an hour before the nurse decides to tell me they had run out of my particular drug on the Friday and were waiting for more to arrive...sigh! I sent Carol running after her to enquire how long this might take...I mean, Carol had work to be doing, we couldnt be sitting around there all day long and we were going back later for a zap anyway! They didnt seem to have a clue, so it was decided that I would come home and go back for that treatment at the same time as my zap at 4.30. We arrived in plenty of time so that the infusion could be done before the zap was due, but once again it was wait wait wait....until I set Carol on them again, who promptly came back to fetch me from the crowded waiting room and through into the treatment room...hoo-bloody-ray! Nonone messes with Carol lol!

Once again they had a job on their hands finding a vein....I dont know where they've all gone, but they certainly take some persuading to appear in order that treatment can begin. They always have to go fetch the nurse who is the 'vein expert' - evidently every ward has one who can almost literally get blood out of a stone lol! Whilst all this was going on I explained what an awful time I had had last time, but I dont think they believed me...theyve never had reports of side-effects before they said....what rot, it does tell you about them in the leaflet, only I was unlucky to suffer them at the extreme end of the scale! However, they did agree to drip the magic potion into me over 30 minutes instead of 15 as I had read that that can help, and indeed it turned out to be so. It was straight from there along to the zap dept.....more waiting - honestly, we felt like we had been there all day long, but once done we came home and I felt well enough, if exhausted - Carol too! She then goes home to a pile of work that takes her into the late night hours, and the triplets of course....oh for a fraction of your 'oomph' Carol!

I just hoped and prayed that the nastiness wouldnt kick in later as it had before, and thank goodness it didnt.....just extreme tiredness, and Ive kind of learned to cope with (or rather 'enjoy') that. In fact, I didnt get up until about 12.30 today...then having had half a cuppa and after emailing happy birthday to Gina, I just had to sleep again so took to the sofa. There I stayed until Carol came to collect me for the FINAL zap at about 3. I was well cosy though and enjoyed drifting in and out of sleep, with the odd visit from my kitties for a snuggle. It certainly beat chucking up and feeling like I would expire at any moment! I did feel a bit wobbly going out though...a little nauseous and even rather faint as we waited for my zap, but I got through it without making a show of myself and 'ta da' the zapping is over! Phew....both Carol and I are very relieved that that is over...its not the procedure but all the endless waiting around....ugh!

So where does that leave me? Well, pain-wise, as has been said before, the next few days I should expect worse before it gets better. Having said that, I havent noticed an increase in pain during these last couple of weeks...not a lot of change either way really, just good and bad days as before. But....as the days go on now I should (I HOPE) begin to feel improvements leading up to pain free.....I cant imagine it, I really cant....but I will SO welcome that day when it comes! I have a review in 3 or 4 weeks time...I dont know what will happen then, will they do another scan...I dont know, I suppose so to see if there is any difference? Im not sure if a lack of pain would mean that there must be a difference so a scan wont be needed? As you can tell, Im not exactly very well informed! But then maybe I dont ask enough questions...I dont like asking questions in case I dont like the answers - I just go with the flow and take it as it comes!!!

At this point I want to say a big fat thank you to Carol - for running me around and being right there with me every step of the way! On the odd occasions when Carol has been unavailable and I have had to rely on my 'alternative chauffeur', my appreciation of Carol simply intensifies beyond belief lol! You have been an absolute star and Im lucky to have you!

I thank ALL of you for your best wishes and sparkles which work their magic by getting me through each day, and I thank you also for putting up with me and my (what Im sure must be tedious) tales of my adventure along the way. Ive a way to go obviously, but from now on lets hope its not taking over my life on a daily basis, and I will have more fun and inspiring things to write about.

Thank you to my office chicks....aw poor yous'...here we are, car scrapping time again and Im escaping that...phew! Im so looking forward to that pain free day so that I can come in to see you all, and better still when I can think about coming back to join you once again as a zapper rather than a zappee...honestly, Id would rather be there than here! (Except at 6.30 in the morning lol!) I will be looking forward to our Christmas get-together...all being well next month....do you think it would be acceptable for me to bring a pillow to the Saracens Head...? lol! Oh, and think on...where will my snuggle corner be situated at work when I come back??? lol!

Ah well, time to attend to my facebook chores before I take to my nest. You all take care, and if I havent bored you to death, I look forward to your next visit and your comments (and stash shopping tales)!

Be good, and as I always say...if you cant be good, hide the receipts!

Super hugs, Sue xxx

Happy Birthday Sam Jack and Ben!

If Im quick I will get this posted before your birthday comes to a close! Congratulations to the 3 of you - 16 today.....and welldone Carol & Russ on surviving lol!

You havent seen these yet boys, but here are your cards.....I only had 16 years notice, but still I was adding stickles at the very last minute, you will have them tomorrow...

I hope you had a great day.....and dont spend your pennies all at once!

With love from Pop and Auntie Sue-bubbles! xxx

Zappity zap zap....half way there!

Five zaps down, five to go...and all is well - lucky me! Pity I cant time my sessions for about 10 O'clock at night...then I might find myself in my nest at a more reasonable hour. As it is, I have slept most of the evening away and now, at gone 3am...Im wide awake...well, as wide awake as Im likely to be just now anyway!

The 'excitement' at todays session was a prisoner being brought out from his zap not long before I went in...super-strength handcuffs, a couple of armed escorts, the works.....and Carol missed it as she was having a nervous breakdown parking the car! Something a bit different..it breaks up the monotony eh lol! The only disappointment was that he wasnt wearing a suit with arrows all over it...he he!

A very modest stash parcel turned up today...here are my new bits and bobs:



A couple of small punches, some pretty little blooms and a gorgeous floral embossing folder - at least I wont have to find too much space to house these little bits...phew! One of these days I might even get around to doing something with them!?! The way I am at the moment, I would find myself nose down in my ink pads..and that wouldnt be a good look!

Oh, there was very nearly a punch up in the chemist today when they couldnt find the prescripion that the doctor promised me she would pop over to them. Much huffing and puffing from Carol and I...and then they found it, so we had to take back all the horrible things we had been muttering about the silly moos over at the surgery lol! At last I got my much needed drugs, and my repeat slips look in good order for next time - what a relief, so hopefully it will be a little while before I have to take on the gestapo again!

The good news is that I am continuing to feel in good spirits - which is THE most important thing to me just now, which will hopefully aid my healing.

"Good" says Lee, who needs me back at work to get on with zapping of a different kind lol! I just cant imagine it Lee, as Im still hobbling around like a 90 year old, never mind all the irritating though not horrid side-effects from all the meds, but we have to have faith in those docs dont we Lee...they have promised me 'pain-free' and how I look forward to that day!

Promo change-over for you tomorrow (or rather later today), in fact you will be gathering in the office in less than 3 hours to get started...good grief! I do hope those sections have done their bit office chicks, and the big zap goes as smoothly as possible - sending oodles of zappy sparkles your way!

Continued deliveries of sparkles for Charlie, and Charlies Mum...bless you, I hope things really do start to look up soon!

Righty, Im off to bed now to have a good read of 'Happyslapped by a Jelly Fish' - I was in fits last night, talk about fetch another Tena Lady...lol!

Take it easy my lovelies, have a good Wednesday and good luck on the lottery!

Big hugs, Sue x

Radiation - Day Four....and still not yet glowing in the dark!

Okay...I know we have had a weekend inbetween my last post and this, but there are limits to how witty I can make 'slept, played on facebook and slept some more' sound lol!

I had a good weekend, ie: no nervous breakdowns...but then having the right 'fix' in the house made all the difference! I did feel myself going a bit wobbly on Sunday (again), which doesnt make sense as thats my favourite day of the week with my sister here most of the day, and the fun (?) of the crosswords, but as I say...pop a happy pill and all is well..phew!

The hip, leg and bum cheeks have been playing up a bit, but then I was warned that things could get worse before they get better so I guess that is that bit kicking in. So far though, no blisters or cystitis or other horrid things, so all in all, things are going pretty well. Another session today, and I have to thank Carol for braving the weather. It was the absolute pits today...winds and rain, and blooming freezing bbbrrrrr! She has the ordeal of finding a parking space and dashing through the elements to get to me. She very kindly drops me off at the doorstep of where I need to be...a few steps to the lift, then a few more steps to the waiting area - and then she goes to fetch the car to pick me up again. I know I keep saying it, but Carol you are a star and I am very lucky to have you supporting me through this 'adventure' xxx

But of course, the day cant go too smoothly can it, and I just knew it would be the gestapo at the docs surgery who would upset the day....sigh! We popped in there on the way home from the hossie to collect my prescriptions, only the gestapo had decided that there were a couple of items I could not have as I had asked for them too early..tut! The paperwork was confusing it has to be said, but the bottom line was, I was been given two weeks worth of these particular meds and then couldnt have any more for a month! Obviously a normal person with an ounce of common sense would have questioned this with the doc, but no...we are not dealing with normal or sensible here are we. Righty, so I need to speak to the doc, no you cant, well she said even though you will say that I cant, I am to tell you that she says that she will.....mmmm.....we've been here before eh! I was angry at myself for not getting more uppity and insistent but they really do get the better of you. However, I did manage to get a promise of a phone call later from another doc...I wanted my doc, and I know my doc would ring if she knew I needed it, but gestapo lady said 'no she cant'. So I just had to wait for the phone to ring and hope that I would get someone nice. And thank goodness I did....phew! She could see the problem straight away and really took the time to listen to my concerns - I thought I was going to have to make a special appointment with my own doc to get this all organised once and for all, but no...she kindly re-jigged my meds to just how I need them, and has done a special extra prescription for the things I need now. Better still, as the surgery is going to be closed tomorrow for training (as obviously noone is going to get sick tomorrow!?!), she will drop the prescription into the chemist across the way so that I can collect it from there. So all's well that ends well, but why this pigging battle every time???

Im sorry, I realise that this is a boring lot of twaddle, but this is the highlight of my days at the moment and you're just going to have to share them with me lol!

It was parcel day once again - yay...but this time not stash (the stash is due tomorrow). I have given up on the murder & mahem that I usually read, preferring things to make me laugh. So todays gems to arrive were: Happy Slapped by a Jellyfish by Karl Pilkingon, An Idiot Abroad..also by Karl Pilkington...have any of you been watching the series on Sky1 - it has been hilarious? And then I have 'My Sh*t Life so Far' by Frankie Boyle - I know he is VERY rude but I do find him very funny so that should be a good read. Plenty to keep me chuckling there anyway.

My appointment with the zapper is rather earlier tomorrow - 12.10, so I shall be having to get up early to give my body a chance to unravel and take in enough tea before I start my day. An early night would be in order, but thats not going to happen as I have all my neighbours to visit on facebook, and I do love visiting my neighbours lol!

Very special sparkles needed today - firstly for Charlie, Lesleys darling pooch, he is poorly and very much in need of a visit from the sparkle fairy. Get better soon our Jelly Belly!

And lots of sleepy & healing sparkles for three of my crafty buddies....Im not pinching all the sleep now, honest!!!

Until tomorrow then, when hopefully I will have a nice little array of new stash to share with you...all I need to do now is find a space for it!

Hugs and sparkles, Sue xxx

Radiation - Day Three.....Zzzzzzzzzzzzz

Well, my day started off very well indeedy....beginning with my usual very slow start until the meds and tea kick in, followed by a little read of the paper, and after two days slog, finally completing the sudukos in yesterdays Sun - I had just settled myself at the pc when a very nice man bangs on the door bringing parcels....stash parcels....whoopee! These were a variety of pretty papers and embellies from QVC who have lots of nice goodies in their clearance section just now (grab them while you can!!!!)

No sooner had he driven off, when Tesco arrived with our shopping...mmm I dont remember all those donuts falling into my cart....lol! Of course, because I was settled in my pc chair...and its no mean feat getting into my cosy position...no way was I getting out of it again to deal with said shopping, so it kept Dad busy for a bit packing it all away while I caught up with mails and my many facebook tasks....nice!

I spent the day relaxing and feeling very positive about things in general, then had a lovely phone chat with our crafty Babs. She is also afflicted with an alien upon her person just now...a suspicious little bugger on her nose. However, she is feeling very up as she has had bits cut out and now awaits results...and boy does she have a wait on her hands....until 7th December, yikes! The good news is that whatever it is will be completely treatable and she will get a pretty new nose out of it lol!

Anyway, so busy was I gossiping away I didnt realise the time when Carol turned up! This time no panics, no flying car passes, just her usual tales of her busy busy morning where she has been running around like a blue arsed fly - honeslty she wears me out just telling me about her days, AND I have to be twice as lazy to make up for her frantic activities just keep the world balanced....ah, its a tough job but someones got to do it lol!

So off we go, ding ding, its round 3. The procedure was fast and fine as always, but this time I did have a couple of sticky moments....one little wobbly feeling as we came down in the lift, but thankfully this passed and hasnt come back, and for a while after, the feeling that I had swallowed acid...bleh, not so nice!

This wasnt going to get in the way of our trip to Midwest however, where we ordered our scrummy big fat ranch style burgers, with bacon and cheese....oh and plenty of the most yummy chippies I have ever eaten on the side...AND BBQ beans AND coleslaw...well, lets push the boat out eh! We couldnt get home fast enough with car filled with this wonderful aroma, and we barely get our coats off before getting stuck in...mmmm.....yum! It was so delicious that even though I sensed that my body didnt really want to be stuffing its face in such a manner, I didnt care and if it decided to 're-visit' me later.......so-be-it!

Thankfully everything has stayed put, so then all I had to contend with was the irresistable urge to sleep, and sleep I did! I think I sort of 'came to' to see most of the soaps, but then the next thing I knew, Dad was nudging me at 10 to remind me that I needed to take my meds. On attempting to move, my body reminded me also, and in fact I had kind of missed out some top up meds by sleeping through...boy I was stiff and sore. But, I went out to swallow my various 'fixes' and in no time at all felt a lot better. I dont think I am feeling actual improvement on top of yesterdays little bit of improvement, but lets see what the morning brings. Ive two days off from zapping now - time for the bits of my body that are getting zapped but dont need it, to recover, and for the naughty bits to get cracking (not literally hopefully) on their retreat! Come Monday.....it will all start again....

Anyway, for me a weekend of......guess what......resting (for a change....NOT), and hopefully maybe some crafting. One of the kits I received today included a lovely scalloped acrylic album, and I have accumulated quite a lot of acrylic in various shapes and sizes over the last couple of years, but yet I dont think I have actually worked with any of it - what a minx! I just need to think up a suitable project and I will be well away...its just all that 'thinking' thats so tricky though eh! We will see...surely there is something I can get my teeth into!?!

Now I cant tell you how many times I have had to backspace/delete in getting this written...my eyes are so droopy, and I wouldnt be surprised if I have nodded off at least twice during the process lol! I guess that means its bed time...my hottie is already up their waiting for me to keep my tootsies warm (with my fan up at the head end to keep my top half cool)!

I hope you all have lovely weekends ahead, and dont forget - I am always eager to hear about any stash shopping trips...complete with lists! lol!

Thank you for popping by!
Hugs & sparkles, Sue xxx

Radiation - Day Two....and it could only happen to my sister!

To set the scene....as I expect you are all well aware, parking ones car at the hossie can be an expensive (and always a very stressy) exercise. However, one of the 'perks' of having to attend for zapping on a daily basis is, you get given a FREE car pass...yes, FREE! It is very strictly managed, the car registration has to be written on and it will only cover you for those specific times that you are being zapped. But, a perk nonetheless and very welcome indeed - just think how many pieces of pretty paper I can buy with what would otherwise have gone to the car parking gestapo....sweet!

However.....

Carol arrives in good time for a quick cuppa before we head off, but is looking very sheepish indeed.

Carol: "On the way home from you last night, I did a very very silly thing"

Me: "Oh no, not caught speeding (again)?

Carol: "Nooooo"

Me: "Popped into Morrisons and spent £130 on shopping that you didnt need (again)?

Carol: "Noooooo....the thing is, I was very hot when I left here (tell me about it...sigh!), so I wound down the window in the car to get cool"

Me: "Mmmm"

Carol: "Well, the car pass only flew out of the sodding window didnt it, and despite me getting out, dashing up and down the road and rummaging through the bushes (in the dark), it was nowhere to be found...and thats it, its gone!"

Ha ha ha ha...! I said to her, it will be along the pathways between this house and yours along with all of your missing earrings...she is always turning up with one missing and swears she had them both in only minutes ago, the soppy moo! It did give us a giggle, and she remarks....I suppose that will be going on your blog later, and I said - too right missus!

Anyway, as commented upon yesterday, the ladies at the hossie are SO much nicer than at your local GP's surgery, so a new pass was issued without any hassle at all (maybe the odd snigger though!) Mind you, Carol did have to pay to park the car today as you just cant risk leaving it while you go in to sort things out...so thats at least 3 sheets of pretty paper down the swanny...sigh! lol!

I dont know, all this fussing about yet once Im wriggled into position, my actual zapping only takes a couple of minutes...a couple of very magic minutes mind you!

So day two is done and dusted....and today I did feel the tiredness when we got home and nothing would have kept my eyes open...not even feeding my pigs on the farm! However, it was a very mellow tiredness and tonight I was able to get myself particularly snuggly on the sofa as my lovely Lesley sent me a prize which arrived this morning....a gorgeous soft blanket with sleeves and a nice big pocket up front for bits and bobs...tissues, mobile...the essentials...oooo Lesley, it is just the ticket, thank you SO much! It goes without saying that you are such a minx!

Having had a good snooze I woke up to no ill-effects once again - hooray, and maybe a little improvement in the hip? Its difficult to say, but I do think it is feeling just that little bit more comfy...and every little helps eh!

No cravings on the way home tonight. Well, I was hungry but I knew Dad had a nice tea waiting for me at home so we are saving our next jaunt to the take-away for tomorrow when my appointment is a little later....we have somewhere in mind where we havent been for years!

So there you are, all in all another very good day. My happy mood stays with me...helped along by Carol's antics of course, and I got the online grocery shop done... and eventually got around to feeding my pigs...so all is well!

I guess I ought to head for my nest now...then I might get to see a bit more of the morning tomorrow! Lets hope tomorrow brings more good things...not just for me, but for a few of my buddies out there who are really going through it and are needing some special sparkles themselves.

Until the next installment, hugs & sparkles, Sue xxx

Radiation - Day One...and all is well

Hooray for late-in-the-day appointments - it meant I could have a good old lie-in and a leisurely morning psyching myself up for my first experience of being on the receiving end (for a change) of the ZAPPER!

Firstly, I was just so happy to wake up feeling in a perky mood - how I have come to value those! I set about drinking plenty of water in preperation, and thought I had better have a big bowl of cereal around midday in anticipation of not feeling much like eating later (oh the irony....)

A little stash parcel arrived from cuttingedge...ALWAYS a good start to the day, and I enjoyed reading the paper and having a bit of a natter with my online buddies to pass the day away. I read up (again) about all the expected side-effects, and this still didnt pop the happy mood bubble, so I was all set and ready to roll!

My chauffeur (AKA Carol) arrived, as did the rain...but hey ho, and off we went. On arrival at the hossie, the waiting area looked packed...sigh, but on checking in, the lovely lady on the desk (and they do have lovely ladies on the desk as the hossie!) assured me that the waiting time was only about 30 minutes. It does make such a difference when they keep you informed like that, and I guess 30 minutes was about right. Enough time for Carol to do some shopping anyway...buying up the Crazy Hats bra brooches, pens and wotnot to add to her collection lol! She will be well skint by the time this treatment is over!

First up was a little chit-chat and Carol came in with me for that - she is my own personal memory bank as my own is shot to hell!

Then into the big room with the BIG zapper, followed by much mirth and laughter as I was contorted into just the right position lining the machine up with the tattoos I'd had done the other day. The nurses left the room for a few minutes, came back in to wiggle me around a bit, then back out for another minute or two...and that was it, all done. I didnt feel a thing or hear a beep and wouldnt know that anything had been done to me at all....phew!

As we left the hossie and were faced with the horrendous tea-time traffic (the down-side of a late appointment), a side-effect that hadnt been mentioned anywhere suddenly kicked in..................I NEEDED a Big Mac and I needed one NOW lol! I was famished, so a minor detour was in order so that I could stuff my face, and boy was that yummy! Im not really a McDonalds kind of person (hence it must have been a side-effect and totally beyond my control!), but thats what I wanted and I was in utter burger & fries heaven lol!

As for genuine side-effects, I gather these will build up as the days go on, but if I keep drinking the water and rubbing the cream in, I will hopefully keep these to a minimum. My hip has felt very stiff this evening, but really not too bad at all, so I am a very happy bunny!

Episode Two tomorrow at 3.50....and I wonder what I will be craving for this time?!?

Thank you as always for your fabby good wishes - I am sure I am glowing with sparkles before I even enter the room, and every single one helps!

Hugs and sparkles back at you!
Sue x

When you crash and burn....

...you pick yourself up, get hold of some happy pills....and start again!


Deary me, one minute I was on here typing up my 'happy post', then the next day....boy did I crash and burn, thats the only way I can describe it! My head decided to take itself off to the darkest of places and no matter what I did, I could not shake it off....as high as the previous couple of days had been, this was the equivelent low - not nice :(


I was right out of the happiest of the happy pills that I have, and of course it was a blooming Sunday so no way of getting hold of anything to help...so it was a case of deep breaths, telling myself that this WILL pass and simply waiting for it to do so. About tea time, I could feel things lifting a little, and believe me, every little helped, and I just kept telling myself...one more sleep then you can organise yourself a way out of this crisis!


Lo and behold, it was getting on a a bit...it must have been gone 9.30 when my Joe rings up....he is up at our local McDonalds and do I fancy a visit!!! He was on his way home from a halloween party up in Newcastle...though how he figures Northampton is on his route back to Cheltenham who knows...I guess he just knew that I needed a hug! It certainly did the trick Joe, thank you my wonderful son! I was still out of sorts, but I did at least feel that I could now cope well enough until daylight came.


Distraction is quite a good solution when you are having inner struggles - I found this out this morning as I encountered the usual argument with the gestapo on the desk at the docs! I had rung in about 3 hours ahead of the appointment I already had with the nurse, simply to ask if she could get my doc to write out a prescription for some happy pills that I could pick up when I got there. 'Of course she cant do things like that' says the gestapo. 'But my doc has said that she WILL do this for me, and I am to tell you that she said she would, so could you just please pass on the message'....tut! She huffed and puffed, and as expected, when I got to the surgery later there was no prescription waiting - the cow! But I had a Plan B, so sod her I thought.


I gets in to see the nurse who has this HUGE needle waiting for me...this was my first implant which will shut down the old ovaries. It was a bit YOW but I was beyond caring about things like that at this point and just winced and beared it lol! Then she persuaded me to have the flu jab. I had only resisted this as I had enough 'side-effects' from this and that to be going with and didnt want to add any more. But she said I really did need it as the radiation will leave me very vulnerable...and who needs flu on top of everything else, so in that went. Then I revealed my very best 'begging for mercy' voice and asked her if she could do me a huge favour...could she possibly ask my doc to do me a prescription there and then as I had had a pig of a Sunday and was desperate. NO problem at all....she just picks up the phone (how easy was that Mrs Gestapo on the desk!!!) and my pills were on their way...phew! My doc, who I know was extremely busy today, even brought the prescription down to me and asked if I needed a chat or anything...bless her! Anyway, a couple of pills later and I had left the dark places and rejoined the world of blue skies and pretty colour leaves falling from the trees....mega phew!


But hey, there is something missing from the above tale...lol! After swearing that I would NEVER get in the car with my Dad again, I actually felt rather too wobbly to drive so I did ask him to take me today! On the whole he was pretty good, there was just the one very near-miss, but we were nearly home AND I had the right pills to take to get over it, so all was well lol!


Now then, I wouldnt come along here and lay a pile of doom and gloom on you without ending on a high - well two highs really....one being brought about with the happy pills to make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside again, and two...I actually completed my little project and am ready to show it off!


Here is the before...a tatty old thing I bought in the hospital charity shop for 30p




...and here it is blinged up with some of my bestest stash...and is just waiting for a nice little space on my emporium wall





I did take piccies along the way and will try to get around to doing a step-by-step slide show soon. It did feel so good to finish something it has to be said, I really ought to try that more often lol!

Anyway, a day off tomorrow from poking and prodding and time to start guzzling water - evidently this SHOULD help alleviate the side effects of the radiation which begins on Wednesday...yay! (I think! lol)

Hugs and sparkles all round, and thank you my friends for helping me through the highs and lows!

Sue xxx

Lets end the week on a high...

...in more ways than one but thats by-the-by lol!

As I sit here at the pc on my big fat pillow, which is doing a very good job of cushioning my big fat bum, I am reflecting on the week that was and am luxuriating in how cosy I am feeling compared to just a few days ago...aaaahhh!

As reported, whenever it was I last reported (I have totally lost track of days!), my body was getting over the chemical warfare of Monday and I was feeling a whole lot better. Well, on Friday I had a surprise visit from my 'baby' Tom, his girlfriend Roz and not forgetting Marley the pooch and I had the most lovely day! Tom has recently started a horticultural course at Moulton College which isnt so far from here, and he had a test on Friday so decided to drop in on his dear old Mum...aw! Here is is showing off his shiny new overalls, and what a proud Mummy I am:



and Tom & his lovely Roz:



We had a wonderful afternoon nattering about this and that, doing the puzzles in the newspaper and generally chilling out. Even Bubbles and Marley came close to making friends, though Daisy ran for cover until the coast was once again clear! I felt so relaxed and comfy, and it was just so nice to have a fix of cheerfulness, as opposed to a certain person shouting at the tv or grumbling about all the doom and gloom in the paper...sigh! It was good to have my boy raiding the fridge while his Roz made me a cuppa...what a treat to have a cuppa made for ME! Then Carol arrived and between them they ate all my chocolate peanuts, but hey...it was worth the sacrifice for such a fun day which did wonders for me on so many levels!

Even when they all went home and I returned to the living room and the 'tv abuse', I could zone it out and carry on my relaxing while I caught up with all my bits and bobs on facebook....oh, so many crops waiting to be harvested and pigs to be fed! I didnt go to bed until about 5.45 am....I didnt want the day to end as it had been such a nice one, and I know this all sounds so cheesy, but sometimes it takes a GOOD day to come along to make you realise just how crappy a lot of the other ones have been recently and make you want to get yourself a few more of the good ones!

And this will tell just how much it perked me up - I found myself able to toddle along to cuttingedge in the wee small hours and do some stash shopping...yay lol! It had been so long, I bet cuttingedge had missed me and I bet profits were down! And theres more...I actually found my way to the emporium today and did a little crafting! I got back to playing with the pretty little wreath that I am making and really enjoyed myself - I might actually finish it soon so that I can show it off to you.

Of course there are one or two other things that have helped bring my good feelings about. One being that I might just have got my meds dose right to keep me really comfy when I am sitting, and even in my bed (as long as I dont try to turn over!) The walking is still hellish, although not AS hellish, and Ive decided that the radiotherapy is just going to have to deal with that. Im adapting to the meds too, and am suffering less of the sleepiness so am getting the good bits without the bad - it all helps. Then most of all, are all those sparkles that are beaming their way to me - never underestimate the power of a sparkle!

I am very much making the most of these good days as this coming week will bring goodness knows what! On Monday my ovaries will be being 'chemically de-activated' he he...and as far as I am aware, the side-effects I can 'look forward to' with that are pretty much those associated with the menopause, ie: hot flushes and mood swings...poor poor Dad lol! Then of course Wednesday will be zappity zap zapping! I understand the side-effects of that (if I get any...but whats the betting?!?) will accumulate during the days of treatment and beyond, and involve a lot of running to the loo with dodgy bowels and possibly cystitis...oh joy! Lets just hope that I do actually re-gain the ability to RUN to the loo in the process he...yikes! Things could get very tricky there!!! However, whatever transpires, it will all be in a good cause as it will all be working its magic to make me better....hang onto that thought Sue!!! And you lot can remind me of that thought too if I come along here in a state of (as Gina puts it) on my nose! lol!

Before I toddle off I have a couple of random photos to share with you. Firstly, here is a gorgeous ceramic cupcake that I found in Wilkinsons...



Perfect for little trinkets or crafty bits and bobs - in fact its a really nice size and Im sure it was less than £2 - a bargain, and Im sure you ALL need one of those!

The other, very random, photo is of my eldest son Joe when he visited recently...and decided to 'entertain' the neighbours by practicing his flute in the garden...



Not exactly dressed for the Albert Hall there are you Joe, and Im not even showing your ODD socks, but hey...good on him teaching himself this that and the rest!

And finally (at last say my readers!), on the 12th of this month it was my dear old Dads 80th birthday (I do love him really!) Celebrations were always going to be difficult as he really doesnt like leaving the house for any length of time and certainly didnt want any fuss. In addition to this - this was when I was in the 'secretive' stage of my little situation and sadly I was unable to involve my boys in anything really as I couldnt face them at that time...lots of regrets about that but its just one of those things.

Well, on the evening of Dads birthday, my sister miraculously persuaded him to indeed leave the house and we went out for a nice meal. Here are a few snaps from the big event:

You can just about see Dad here sitting behind his cupcakes complete with 80 candles...



...and just after he blew them out (all on his own!)



...and a piccie of the family



From left to right we have: Sam Ben Jack (my sisters triplets), Anne & Keith (my bro), me, Dad, Carol (sis) & Russ.

And there you have it, I think I am all caught up....phew! Thank you so much for popping by, and if you have got down this far.....welldone you!

Here's to a lovely Sunday - it will the crossy for me and Carol.....and a trip down the sweetshop to replace those chocolate peanuts!

Big hugs, Sue xxx

Just a quicky....

...to let you know that I am feeling a whole lot better than I was at my last post...jeez that was a yukky couple of days! I have since found out through research that my reaction to the drug I had on Monday is quite typical...thats not what they tell you in the blurb though of course! Evidently, the first dose is usually the worst and drinking plenty of water before and after is very helpful...so at least I have a strategy for next time!

Today was my assessment ahead of my radiotherapy, and on first arriving at the hossie they said I would be getting my first treatment this afternoon....WHAT???? However, this turned out to be an 'administrative error' and actually I will commence zapping on Wednesday...yay! This doesnt by any chance coincide with promo changeoever does it Lee? lol! I had my little tattoo dots done today - not that Ive looked for them yet...with all this blubber I doubt I would find them, but Im all set to go!

Regarding your comment to my last post about my Dads driving Lee - you could not be more spot on! Add up all the incidents over the years, multiply by a zillion and we could be getting close.................it was an utter nightmare and I have decided absolutely never ever again! I would sooner have walked...even in my state! Thank goodness that Carol will be on radiation duty, and if for any reason she cannot make it, I shall call a cab!

I thank you for your continued hugs and sparkles...see, they are getting through and working their magic! I'd ask for a few for Dads driving abilities...but dont bother, we wont be going there again!

I hope you are all having nice sleeps, Im going to harvest a few crops before heading for my nest and with a bit of luck, sleep through the grocery delivery in the morning lol!

Hugs & sparkles back at you!
Sue xxx

So where did the fairies bugger off to...???

A little update following Mondays treatment, as I believe where I left you last...I was waiting to welcome the fairies into my little world and enjoy a good nights sleep....

Sigh.... the fairies abandoned me Im afraid, or rather the gremlins shoved them out of the way, and I had the most dreadful night...pain, panic attacks and to top it all off...chucking up my cheese & onion sarnies in the middle of the night - absolutely NOT nice! I spent yesterday in bed moaning and groaning, only getting my weary arse out of bed when sis came to visit at about 5. Those bloody kitties kept jumping all over me, and resisted my efforts to shoo them off by sinking their claws in....they are lucky I am not sitting here now wearing a pair of odd slippers!!!

Thankfully today I have felt a little better as the day has gone on....I needed to get those pain meds back in me having chucked them up (sorry, but I did promise you gore!), and hopefully this blip will be very short lived. By the time I have my next infusion I will probably have had my zapping done so things will be different....and hopefully in a positive way! Tomorrow morning is my assessment for the radiotherapy - that shouldnt be too traumatic (other than Dad is driving me there...yikes!), and Im guessing I will get a start date for the treatments. Fingers crossed that I will not be such a BABY for the next onslaught!

I do apologise, but try as I might, I cant find a 'funny angle' to the last two days....I must try harder!

Will try to check in with you all again tomorrow with an update, but meanwhile sending oodles of sparkles out there to all in need!

Sue x

Hooray....its all systems GO!

Firstly, let me thank you all from the bottom of my heart for all of your sparkles and good wishes, jokes and for some of you poor souls...your battered ear'ols when Ive needed a rant about you know who..and boy have I had the need to rant! If I thought 'his' driving was the worst thing I would have to put up with, I was very much mistaken....but zip it Sue, you never know, one day he might come along and read this!

Anyway, today brought a whole new range of experiences as I went for this 'infusion' of magic potion which will harden up my manky bones and hopefully hold back the tide of doom lol! Some things never change...the hell that is parking the car for a start - I left that to Carol after she dropped me at the door and I shuffled my way along the maze of corridors. Then an hours wait before being called in, but hey ho, we dont expect anything different do we and as long as they give me all the time I need once I do get in there, Im fine with waiting (just!) . But when I was finally called through, well, I was really taken aback and a little shocked if Im honest. There was this big room resembling an old peeps home, with patients of all ages, shapes and sizes scattered around doing their chemo thing all out in the open! I kind of expected a quiet room all to myself...I dont know why, but if these things are nothing else, they are a learning curve! I really didnt like it at first, but after a while I did warm to the idea....the hustle and bustle around you was a welcome distraction (although the various beeping of the machines drove Carol up the wall...she isnt into beeping things....or cats meowing!) You could if you chose, have a natter with your 'neighbour', and on the whole it made the time go by quicker. Having said that, Im glad my bag of dollop only takes 15 minutes to infuse into me - some of those folk had been in there for hours! Of course that 15 minutes only begins once theyve done with faffing about getting things ready, and most time-consuming of all...finding a blooming vein they could work with....mine all seem to go into retreat in such surroundings which isnt very useful eh! Anyway, once up and running, it was all very comfy and so far I have felt no ill effects - and no REALLY GORY details to inflict upon you which is really disappointing lol! I will be back for more of that in 3 weeks time and that will continue for as long as it is doing me some good.

However, the day turned out to be about more than just a bag of goop - I now have more appointments and I feel that we will very soon be getting down to the nitty gritty. On Thursday morning I go for my radiotherapy assessment - this will involves scans to identify where exactly they want to zap, and I may get some little tattoos to mark these out. This makes it quicker when you go for the actual zapping as they just line things up and away you go. I hope its true what Rachel in Friends says, and these tats will be licked on by kittens...lol! Im hopeful that now this appointment has come through, I could possibly commence zapping as early as next week! Surely I will be able to extract a bit more gore out of that!!! ha ha ha!

Thats not all, I have my appointment also to put my ovaries to sleep - that will be next Monday.

What a lot of happenings for one day! Although this is exactly what I wanted....I did have a wobbly evening feeling rather overwhelmed with it all....scary/excited, it is all quite mind blowing!

Speaking of 'my mind'....I am awaiting a visit from the fairies this evening as my morphine has been significantly increased. I was a bit cheeky and took a bit extra over the weekend and it did make that little bit of difference which was very welcome. So I spoke to my GP today and confessed...and she said I had actually been very sensible (I know my crafty buddies find that hard to believe, but she did use the word sensible about ME...honest!) She agreed to up the dose even a little bit higher and I look forward to some comfier days.

Oh it was such a relief to get home and start to relax, and now I look forward to a couple of peaceful days of doing nought!

The eyes are feeling rather droopy now and I think those fairies are on their way, so while I can still focus, I will wish you all sweet dreams and a very happy Tuesday!

Hugs, Sue x

Just one 'courageous conversation' left...

...and this is it....

I could go all round the houses and up the flag poles, but that wouldnt really make this any easier for me or those of you who do not already know my news.

The thing is, the jippy hip has turned out to be something rather more 'difficult' than the odd slipped disc or me being a funny shape. That naughty breast cancer has come back to bite me on the bum...quite literally, and has taken up residence in my pelvic bone. Though this is pretty grim news, on Tuesday when I went for the results of the many tests I have had, this was the best of news as I have to tell you, that without explanation I was called back for CT scans on my liver and chest....and OMG words cannot describe how that made me feel - doomed I guess pretty much sums it up!

But all my other bits and bobs are clear and safe (HUGE relief!), therefore I have one contained area that is going to need some work. Seeing the image on the screen was scary I have to admit, as a pretty significant area appears to be affected, but it did explain all the pain, and it does seem to be all bunched together so to speak - so with plenty of sparkles I am hopeful that we can kick its butt!

For those of you who are interested, my treatment plan is as follows: Already we have binned the Tamoxifen as it clearly hasnt done the job it was designed to do. I have been given the alternative drug which is for post-menopausal women...and as my body isnt clear where it stands in that respect, I will be having monthly implants which will put my ovaries to sleep. (Sorry Dad, but it seems any hopes of a grandaughter have finally been dashed! lol!)

Next up, starting Monday I will be having infusions (injections via IV) every 3 weeks of a drug which strengthens bones & prevents spread of nasties among other magic things.

THEN the big guns come out when I will have radiotherapy. I am waiting for the appointment for that but it should be very very soon. I will do a Monday-Friday, have a weekend off, then Monday-Friday again and that will be done and dusted...just all the meds to keep things under control and HOPEFULLY keep things shrunk!

NO CHEMO...phew!

Evidently, this is going to result in me being pain-free...woohoo....Ive forgotten what thats like! For the last week or so, I have been having morphine - the very idea of having that was a trauma in itself to be honest, but a couple of days of feeling wobbly about it later, I accepted it as necessary to get this pain under some sort of control. I have had reasonable days, but I think we still have a way to go with getting the dose high enough as getting about is still way too much effort. Mind you, if they get the zapping underway soon enough, it might be that we can dispense with the morphine altogether soon anyway.

So then came my courageous conversations - telling my precious boys....jeez that was the hardest bit of all. I had made the decision that I could not tell them anything until I had the full picture, ie: extent of the problem and a treatment plan in place. Any earlier than that and they would have suffered the sheer fear that I and the people around me have suffered and I simply could not see any point in that. The bottom line was that I didnt really know very much at all - I was being sent for tests without any back-up information, which was just plain cruel in my view, and I wasnt about to spread that about! Things could have turned out to be far far worse, but they did not..so the time was right. All my boys came running for a big fat hug and we had lots of giggles and no tears...well, not that they let me see anyway! It was a relief to get that bit over, pop the first of my new pills and get this healing show on the road!

Carol, my sister has been my rock - she came in to see the consultant with me to get the results which I thought was very brave (I just wanted to run for it!), and she was marvellous with gathering information that was going in one ear and out of the other to me..as there was just so much of it. She has done endless running around for us, and most importantly has kept my pecker up at those tricky moments....AND held back tears - I saw them welling up Carol, and way to go girl for holding them back! She has put up with my moans and groans about Dad...as have my buddies, as he keep trying to feed me things I dont want and continues to watch nothing but war stuff on the tele! Sigh...!

I thank my office chicks and the little group of crafty buddies who thankfully sent enough sparkles to make things not so bad, and have also kept my pecker up at those (many) tricky moments! On the up-side....I have had a good few weeks, with more to come, of NOT having to iron that bloody uniform lol! Every cloud eh.....

Anyway, there you are....thats the news and phew....all my courageous conversations are done...hooray!

I will no doubt feel compelled to share the odd gory detail with you as indeed I did before, but as always I will be looking out for the funny side of things.....you can always find them if you look hard enough, and I will apologise up front in case I offend anyone along the way!

I welcome all and any sparkles that you can spare, and I am sending plenty out there to those in need..and you know who you are my lovelies. Gossip (the juicier the better), and jokes...inappropriate or otherwise all welcomed!

Righty, my work is done...now for a chill-out weekend. Have a good one ladies!!!

Hugs, Sue x

HELLO ALL..yes, I am still here....but....

....I think I am still having difficulties coming to terms with the nature of my last post...you know, the one that seems to imply that one day, in the not too distant future...I am going to have to locate the bloody ironing board.....and USE IT...good grief!

Since that post, I have been repeatedly washing and tumbling...yes, you hear me you naughty blouse making people....TUMBLING the one shirt in the hope that the fabric will indeed soften and that the wrinkles (of which there are sadly very many...ggrrrrr!!!) will fall out all by themselves - and do you know what, I cannot possibly return to work until this matter is resolved! Why the doc would not put 'untreatable stress at the thought of ironing' on my sick note, I really do not know...surely this is an entirely legitimate reason to wangle some 'crafting leave'!!! Evidently it is not, so I have had to come up with other strategies to achieve my annual crafting leave lol! Im afraid that I am unable to elaborate further on those strategies until I have had some 'courageous conversations' - probably later this week....and I didnt even get to go on the courageous conversation course...eeeek!!!!

Suffice to say at this point that I continue to have a jippy hip! Being the most lazy person in the world, my recent weeks of lounging around have not been too difficult I suppose and in fact, things have been made even more cosy since the arrival of a new flannel bedding set - QVC Northern Nights...I thoroughly recommend it! Stripping the old bedding off was a bit of a trial of course, but I saved 'the best bit', ie: getting the duvet into the duvet cover for my sister to do...ha ha ha! She did state in no uncertain terms that I was now taking 'playing on my incapacitated state' way too far...he he...but she did the deed without much growling at all....thank you Carol! However, she has warned me, that no way on this Earth will she be feeding my kitties if I continue to give them Felix out of a can as it makes her gag... and if such assistance becomes necessary, it will be dry food or they can starve for all she cares! And she is an animal lover too lol! No worries...I have purchased bags of dry food just in case!

Odds and ends of crafting have been done - I might even get some piccies on here soon, only I keep starting things then getting bored with them so start something else. I dont think a slide show of half finished projects would be that inspiring really would it! More than that, I dont think I have enough gigabytes on the pc to actually feature ALL of my half done projects!

Ah well, there's a little update for you and now its time to harvest some crops, feed the pigs and shove some MP3 players on me shelves...oh, its all go here!

Special sparkles go to the office chicks, who...not only have to do my zapping but also have a pile of the ghastly 'i' word to do each week too!

Big hugs all round! Sue x

'DO NOT TUMBLE DRY'.....what the &*$% ?!?

But first, lets set the scene....think 'the 1970's' - more specifically think 1970's kitchen tiles...

...conjure up if you will, an image not dissimilar to this:



You might (if you are posh..lol!) recognise this as the delightful print on the uniform of a particularly upmarket (with excellent customer service) supermarket.

I recall the time when I first clapped eyes on it about six years ago, and thought...'oh no, how 1970's kitchen tiles...and bleh!' However, over time I found that this uniform brought with it significant advantages - namely, you could bung it in the washing machine followed by a quick tumble...this sometimes being very useful when one has forgotten to put things in the dryer the night before and needs it dry fast - and you could happily leave a weeks supply in the tumbler, taking them out only when needed and not a crease or even a tiny wrinkle would be in sight...yay! This is MY kind of clothing - maybe the retro look aint so bad!

But, earlier this year came the big announcement that we are being brought up to date (I will reserve judgement on that one), and a new uniform was on its way. We saw piccies in the Chronicle and then on posters and leaflets, and I think many of us were still in two minds about how keen we were, but then we had the big 'try on' session and suddenly we came round. Oh yes, this is lovely and fresh, and SO much nicer - despite needing sizes ranging from 14 to 18 for the different garments...whats that all about?!? Oh yes, remember what the physio said...you are a funny shape Sue! Mmmmm.....

Anyway, it would be all systems go in July...then this was put back and we had to contain our excitement until September, but of course I find myself absent from the launch still being incapacitated. No worries however, as my trusty boss Lesley said that not only would she bring my new uniform round to me, but she would have it washed pressed and hanging on hangers, all ready for my return (as Alison is my witness!)......erm...

Does this look like washed pressed and on hangers to you???



Tut...you just cant get the staff these days! lol!

Anyway, thats by the by as the real shocker was yet to come - delivered with great relish in a telephone call by our Barb. She calls up and goes all round the houses with the news from her holiday, her decorating and her new curtains, and her fall off the sofa (how many had you had???) leaving her on crutches too - when she slipped the bombshell into the conversation - the new uniform CANNOT BE TUMBLE DRIED! The implication being of course that it WILL need showing the iron every week, and if there was anything to give me a relapse that was it! I did not believe her - I thought she knows what Im like and that Barb is such a minx, I bet she's spent all day thinking this one up - but no, I ripped open a packet and there it was....



Someones having a laugh surely!!!! I mean its polycotton - whats not tumblerable (that IS a real word in this house) about polycotton???

Well Im sorry, but Im just not having it.....so in you go....



...and round and round you go....



...and if you dont behave yourself......four shirts, size 22 please Lesley - washed pressed and hanging on hangers!!!

Happy thoughts, Sue x